See you soon!


Hello Lovelies!

I’m sorry to say I will not be scheduling any appointments until mid-November, as I’ve recently had minor surgery, and I want to make sure I’m 100% before I give 100%.

So, for those of you who I’m scheduled to see soon–we’re still on! And for those of you who were thinking of asking me out within the next two weeks, I’ll need to take a rain check. My loss. :(

But!! I do have several wonderful, gorgeous, unique, fun friends in the area, and if you’d like me to recommend one who is available while I’m not, feel free to ask. I’d love to know you’ve had fun, even if I’m not the one who’s to blame for it! ;)

Annie

A Long-Awaited Escort-Client Private Party

I had the sweetest client the other night. After emailing back and forth a few times over the past couple months, we finally met…and he had something of a surprise waiting for me…

First I saw this, and I didn’t think anything of it…

New Orleans Escort Annie Calhoun

…and then I saw this:

Annie Calhoun - Escort in New Orleans - Appointment with client

He decorated his room at Le Richelieu Hotel and we had our own escort/client private party ;)

And to top it off, he also got me a book!

HR Mencken - Client Gift

I <3 my clients!

Transphobia on ECCIE

I finally said something about the rampant transpohobia on ECCIE (<—click that for the full thread):

So. The topic is TS providers.

One thing that really, really bothers me about this board is how transgender-phobic so many of the guys seem to be.

Now, don’t tell anyone this**, but I love sex. LOVE IT. I love sex with men, and I love sex with women. Basically, I like to have sex with people I find attractive. And I’m attracted to a pretty wide range of people, especially if they can make me laugh, or think, or give me a bit of lively conversation. I’ve never had sex with a transgender person, but who knows, I might love that too. But if I don’t, you sure won’t find me criticizing other people who do.

Actually, I know quite a few men who are attracted to (and like to have sex with) transgender women. It’s far more common than some of you might think (yeah, for some reason, my guy friends feel comfortable telling me more or less everything pertaining to their sex life and sexuality). They don’t tell anyone this, of course, because of the stigma attached. They’re afraid of the backlash they may receive from other men.

Case in point:

Review: TS Jennifer: Hell of a Time

I find most of the responses to this review to be pretty mean-spirited and immature, and they don’t reflect well on the commenters. And I wholeheartedly agree with this guy’s comment:

Quote:
Originally Posted by downtownguy View Post
You all should be more respectful in your replies, or just don’t reply. I’m sure these comments cause a lot of people to not post ts reviews. The more reviews the safer we all can be.

and this one:

Quote:
Originally Posted by TeddyRuxpin225 View Post
Some terrible replies in here. People tripping all over themselves to come in and declare “not gay!” or how disgusting this is. It’s this mans personal preference and he shouldn’t be belittled or ostracized for it. This may not be my preference, but I welcome his review and others like it since there is clearly some interest in it.

Let’s hear that again, shall we?

Quote:
It’s this mans personal preference and he shouldn’t be belittled or ostracized for it.

I know this kind of behavior is just mirroring the prevailing attitudes in Real Life, but that doesn’t make it OK (obviously), and I think it’s actually, in a way, worse to perpetuate those attitudes here on the boards. So you find it disgusting? Fine then; don’t read the review–there’s a great big “TS” there in the subject line to let you know this is not the review you’re looking for. But by treating a reviewer in this manner, you’re discouraging other men from reviewing their sessions with TS ladies. And that leads to a dearth of reviews of TS providers on the boards, which makes the boards pretty much useless for any gentlemen looking for that experience. And why do we have the boards at all? Isn’t the whole point to keep the hobby fun, safe, and satisfying for everyone involved?

As it is, most TS ladies wouldn’t be able to get access to the Infoshare if they wanted it. Why? Because they can’t get VP status…because they have no reviews…because board members are shamed if they even admit to having met with a TS provider. No wonder guys don’t want to review them!

By being jerks to guys who review TS providers, you’re not just being immature; you’re denying them the same benefits the rest of us get from the boards: most importantly, a reasonable expectation of safety when an ECCIE-active hobbyist with good references chooses to visit an ECCIE-active provider with good reviews.

So stop with the middle-school-esque “OMG-I’m-sooo-grossed-out-by-who-YOU-like” fest, will ya, gentlemen?

**Yes, I’m joking. Tell everyone!!

For the record, this article by Janet Mock (a trans woman and activist) is what got me started thinking about this so much today: How Society Shames Men Dating Trans Women & How This Affects Our Lives

My Screening Practices Explained, Part 3: Scheduling a Date with an Escort & Providing References

**This is Part 3 of a three-part series explaining some of the most common screening methods escorts, providers, and other adult entertainers use to ensure safety and discretion with clients.**


“Can I use you as a reference?”

So yesterday I received an email from a client I had an absolutely amazing time with a few weeks back. This gentleman was inquiring as to whether he could use me as a reference. For those of you who aren’t that familiar with how providers and clients meet each other safely, or how we know if we even want to meet each other (i.e., will we be compatible?), allow me to explain.

Providers use many, many methods of screening (I’ve written two pretty extensive blog posts on the screening methods I use: My Screening Practices Explained – Part 1 and Part 2 – P411, Date-Check, and References.). When you schedule a date with a provider (escort, personal/professional companion, FBSM/sensual massage provider, etc.), she may ask you (the hopeful client) for “references.” What she’s asking for is permission to contact providers you have met with previously (usually two or three of them).

Why do we ask for this? Well, here’s the thing: women talk. (So do men, of course, but I haven’t interacted with many male providers, unfortunately. I’d love hear their perspective on this, though.) And in this business, we look out for each other–or at least, those of us who are decent human beings do. So, before we meet with a client, we like to consult each other to make sure the guy is safe and respectful. And sometimes, just sometimes, we might get a few insider tips on what that client really enjoys. ;)

This isn’t very different from “real-life” dating. We all exist within social circles. In the past, whenever I’ve been “romantically” (or simply sexually) interested in someone, I’ve consulted with mutual friends to get the scoop on him/her. And boy, have I dodged some bullets. But my behind-the-scenes detective work (if you can call asking a friend “So, what’s the deal with so-and-so?” “detective work”) has also led to some truly amazing, satisfying romantic encounters, relationships, and friendships.

So, when I received the following email from this gentleman (copy/pasted, in part):
Continue reading “My Screening Practices Explained, Part 3: Scheduling a Date with an Escort & Providing References”

So I just read “The Dark Arts” by Ben Marcus…

This is easily the best piece of short fiction I’ve read in years.  

I’ve read a ton of great fiction in my day, but wow.  This story floored me in a way that I can’t remember happening in a very long time, probably since undergrad.  Not that I’m not routinely impressed and affected by great writing (I am); I read a lot of work by contemporary writers and occasionally revisit my old favorites, and I’m lucky enough to be surrounded by artists (literary, visual, musical, performance, etc) who continually surprise and inspire me with their talent.  But damn, sometimes something just knocks you on your ass and you think, wow, this person just reached up into my gut and punched me in the brain…and it was good.

I got that feeling when I read this:

“Instead, Julian was stuck with whiny, nasal English, in which every word was a spoiled complaint, a bit of pouting. In English, no matter what you said, you sounded like a coddled human mascot with a giant head asking to have his wiener petted. Because you were lonely. Because you were scared. And your wiener would feel so much better if someone petted it. How freakishly impolite, how shameful, to let these things be revealed by one’s language. At least overseas he didn’t speak much English. He didn’t speak much anything.”

“The Dark Arts” by Ben Marcus (from the May 30 issue of The New Yorker)

(sidenote: shoutout to this blog, which I like to check after I’ve read a particularly good–or particularly unsatisfying–story in TNY. I’m happy to say we’re in agreement on this one.)

P.S.:  Thank you for the subscription.  You know who you are.

We all have our strengths…

…and we all have our weaknesses.

One of mine is auto-photography. I suck, suck, suck at the Art of the Selfie (selfie: n. photograph taken of oneself in an attempt to display one’s sexiness to online viewers of said photograph).

Regardless, here are a few attempts from last night. At least you can tell that I haven’t changed much…

Annie Calhoun, New Orleans Courtesan and Escort
My only somewhat-successful attempt to utilize the timer function on my little camera.

Continue reading “We all have our strengths…”

“Best Escort in New Orleans” – Things That Made Me Happy Today

  1. Emails from my favorite clients ;)
  2. The scent of Night-Blooming Jasmine.
  3. A trip to the park with my dog to enjoy the lovely weather.
  4. It was warm enough to wear a tank top!
  5. Riding my bike in the French Quarter through crowds of happy, ridiculously-dressed drunk people celebrating St. Patrick’s Day.
  6. This video. Even monkeys understand fairness.
  7. Lovely gifts! This week I received Life of Pi by Yann Martel, and these amazing and fun shoes!
  8. The great big pot of homemade jambalaya I made and shared with my best friend.
  9. The wonderful company of said best friend.

  10. and last, but certainly not least…

  11. Just for fun, I did a Google Search using the terms best escort in new orleans, and look what came up!!
    Annie Calhoun - best escort in New Orleans, and New Orleans's best escort.
    Well, if Google says I’m the best escort in New Orleans, it’s GOT to be true. /sarcasm.

    I’m the third result on page 1 of Google’s search results!!! Wow! Pretty nifty. It also works for: new orleans best escort. Yay! Thanks for the ego boost, Google! (Google’s results will probably have changed by the time you click on those links, but whatever. Trust me on this. I took a screenshot for you and everything!)

Words to Live By

This is one of my favorite quotes, and it just occurred to me to put it here:

“What do we live for, if it is not to make life less difficult to each other?”

— George Eliot (Mary Ann Evans), Middlemarch

I’ve always loved this quote, and I try to keep it in the front of my mind and to allow it to guide the decisions I make. I’ve been an escort for a little over a year, and I’ve had this website and blog since March of 2012. Given the unique nature of the relationships I have with my clients, I’m surprised that it took me this long to realize how appropriate it is in this context.

New Year, New Resolutions

Last year I made a few New Year’s resolutions, and I’m pretty proud to report that I actually kept them! They were:

  • Work out regularly
  • Do yoga regularly
  • Make a website
  • Make Greek yogurt a part of my daily balanced breakfast ;)

I’m still working out–I actually kept with it! I found that, for me, the key was to make it as easy and convenient as possible for myself. I only work out for about 20-30 minutes, and I read the Short Fiction inThe New Yorker (generously gifted to me by a particularly awesome client) while doing so. This way, I’m doing two things at once, which makes me feel like I’m being efficient, haha. Also, the story distracts me from the fact that I’m doing something not only strenuous, but boring.

As for yoga, about halfway through the year I started taking weekly yoga classes. I cannot extoll the virtues of (good) yoga enough. There’s nothing like that post-yoga-practice “high.” It’s amazing.

Obviously, I made a website. This, I have to say, might be my proudest accomplishment this year. I never thought I’d be able to figure this kind of thing out. I remember when I first bought the domain and hosting back in March. Wow. I’m ashamed to admit it took me DAYS to figure out how to point a domain to a server and then download the software. And that’s before you even start making the site.

Greek yogurt: OK, I know this one sounds hokey, but that stuff is really good for you! Live cultures are great for keeping your digestive system balanced. Also, I went years without eating many animal products–I’m not big on dairy products, and I rarely eat meat other than seafood (and I only get seafood about once a week)–and I finally realized that it’s just too difficult for me to get enough protein from a plants-and-seafood-only diet.

So, what’s in store for 2013? I’m not quite sure yet. I want to set sensible, reachable goals.

I’d really like to learn how to work on cars, but as you can probably gather from that statement, I have no idea what that entails, and I’m sure it’s far too complex for me to figure out in my spare time.

Maybe I should aim to get back into photography? I wanted to take a course, but I missed the deadline to sign up. :(

I’m really at a loss on this one. Obviously, I should continue with the progress I’ve made on my previous goals. For instance: a few years ago, I decided to start donating money to a different worthy cause each month–that’s one I’m still doing (Check out the one I chose this month: Pets of the Homeless), and will continue to do. And there are things I always need to work on, like writing more, etc. But it’s fun to have a new project to work on. I had a client recently who writes a quick note on a postcard and sends it off to a friend every morning. Perhaps I’ll do that. I love snail mail, and I know others do, too. I know I loved getting this little gem in the mail a couple months back. I’m just afraid that the whole “do this every single morning” thing will be too tough and I’ll get discouraged. My morning “routine” is, um, not very efficient. I’m actually surprised I was able to add the Greek yogurt commitment in there for an entire year; it’s more of an accomplishment than you might think, lol.

Well, if you have any suggestions (or especially cool resolutions of your own that I might be able to adopt as well), feel free to comment or shoot me an email!

Apologies!! My lack of email response was due to technical difficulties, not lack of enthusiasm ;)

Hello everyone!

For a few days there, I…must have done something wrong, and my stupid smartphone wasn’t synching with my email the way it’s supposed to. Anyway, I just assumed that everyone was as busy with pre-holiday stuff as I was, and that I simply wasn’t getting any inquiries.

Well, imagine my surprise when I actually opened my laptop and signed into my email account and I had been receiving emails this whole time! So, I just wanted to say that I’m sorry if it seems that I’ve ignored your email–my lack of response was not intentional, and had I known I was receiving emails, I would have responded to them promptly.

I’ve chosen not to respond to the ones that were requesting an appointment in a very limited timeframe that has already past, as I have not yet built my time machine (still working on it, guys–gimme just a little while longer) and hence am not able to travel back to the days you requested and make it up to you, and I think it might be inappropriate for me to respond now that you’re back at work, doing your regularly scheduled work stuff.

However, I just want to put this out there: if you’re local and still interested in meeting up (or, for visitors: if you come back through NOLA and you’re still interested in meeting up), please don’t hesitate to contact me! From now on, I’m double checking my email account on my trusty, faithful, won’t-let-me-down, never-hides-my-email laptop.

Short Stories (Fiction) in The New Yorker

I’m not the biggest fan of the gym, so I make it more enjoyable by bringing along an issue of The New Yorker (one of my lovely clients bought me a subscription!) so that I can read the short fiction while I work out. It works pretty well.

So I found a cool blog: New Yorker Story Critiques

And now, when I finish a story, I get out my phone and look at the blog to see what they thought. So I guess this blog is indirectly contributing to my overall health, seeing as I end up staying on the elliptical for a few extra minutes, lol.

Accolades, Fan Mail, and Praise

I’ve been thinking of doing this for a while. I occasionally receive gifts and/or flattering emails from readers of my blog. Some are potential or former clients; some are simply folks who either stumbled upon my site accidentally while perusing other sites or found it while searching for tell-all blogs full of racy stories written by professional companions (if you read this blog regularly, you know that’s not what they found here, haha).

Sometimes I feel like when I’m writing this blog I’m sending posts out into a void: a vast and empty space on the internet where no one actually reads anything, they simply click around in search of free photos and spammable email addresses. And because I rarely receive comments (hint, hint–I love comments, people. I even have it set so that you can leave them anonymously, jeez.), it’s easy to convince myself more and more often that that is the case. So, it’s always nice when someone drops me a line to let me know I’m wrong ;)

Anyway, these generous gifts and thoughtful emails always brighten my day (or week, as it were). And, ya know, I don’t want to brag…well, yes I do. So, I thought I’d share a few with you.

Fan Mail

November 2012

I would be ashamed to admit how many courtesan/escort websites I have
perused (and admittedly judged). You have done a magnificent job of
arranging yours. It is one of the few that I’ve seen that is FUN to
explore. From the alluring photos that make you a very desirable woman
to trying to guess where the photos taken, it rates as one of the
best. Your personality flows from page to page.

When I sent the link to my girlfriend, her reply was “She’s Funny!”.
High praise from someone who is difficult to impress.

_______

October 2012

Folks…If you are looking for a young lady who is sexy and well educated, then Annie is a must see in New Orleans.from TER

October 2012

Hi Annie! :)

My name’s ____…and no, this isn’t what you think. I am a hobbyist and have more than a few references that can vouch for what kind of gentleman I am…

in (city that’s really far away from New Orleans)!

I just started reading your blog and really enjoy it. (Insert semi-identifying info about this gentleman’s connection to New Orleans).

Hopefully I’m not wasting your time with this email. Obviously, it would be difficult for us to schedule time together because of our distance issue. I am hoping, however, that I may call you a “blog friend” and fellow New Orleanian and continue to enjoy your writings. Maybe someday in the near future, a meeting could take place.

Until then, thank you for the enjoyable blogging, and stay safe.

___

September 2012

Hi Annie,

I hope this message finds you well and in good spirits.

Up front, with 2 kids in out of state private colleges to the tune of
100K a year, I’m not a potential customer…I feel like it would be
taking something away from them if I was. I just wanted to share a few
thoughts.

Anyway, I divide the world up into two groups of people. Interesting
and not very interesting. Money, power, or social status have nothing
with my decisions, you are either interesting or not.

Well, Annie, YOU are interesting. Continue reading “Accolades, Fan Mail, and Praise”

My Screening Practices Explained, Part 2: P411, Date-Check, TER, and References

 

**This is Part 2 of a three-part series explaining some of the most common screening methods escorts, providers, and other adult entertainers use to ensure safety and discretion with clients.**

 

(continued from My Screening Practices Explained, Part 1: Just Google Me, Baby!)

Soooo…

Screening Sites

In addition to the identity verification system I outlined in Part 1, I do, like many other providers, accept provider references and use P411 as part of my screening process, but I no longer accept Date-Check.

escort screening site preferred411 P411
P411 logo: Kinda looks like a logo for some kind of feminine hygiene product, doesn’t it?

P411 (or Preferred 411, if you want to be fancy and call it by its full name) is a site where clients network with providers. Basically, providers vouch for clients.

This is how it works: A provider meets with a client, and then she reports back to the site regarding whether the client is safe to meet with or not. If she feels that he was a gentleman, she will indicate that. This is called an “Okay.” If she felt that her safety was jeopardized by meeting with him, she will report him. The next time he decides to meet with a provider, she can check the “Okays” he has been given, and then contact those providers for further details. Using this system, providers can quickly and easily vet potential clients based on how other providers felt after sessions with him.

date check is terrible
Date-Check.com: Really, Date-Check? Neon yellow and fire-engine red print on a bright purple background? My eyes, my eyes!! It burns!!!!

Date-Check is similar, just uglier and clunkier. Seriously, it looks like they jumped into a time machine, traveled back to 1998, and asked a 7-year-old with a drug problem to design that website. It’s a mess. Also, the admins/owners of that site are…not the brightest of the bunch. For example, at the moment they have me listed as “retired.” Why? Because I had the gall to tell them that, if they were going require me to pay them for access to their site (a site whose main revenue comes from the traffic and paid subscriptions of clients who are searching for escorts), then they needed to pay me for access to my photos and content. You see, they elected to keep my photos, content, contact info on their site after notifying me that my account was no longer free. I’m not OK with a company using my material to pull traffic to their site and giving me nothing in return, so I asked them to restore my account or remove my profile. Somehow, they understood that as, “I’m quitting the business.” Um, no.

There are several other websites similar to these. Different sites are more popular in different locations. For example, Room Service 2000 (RoomService2000.com) is popular in Chicago. P411 is probably the most widely used in New Orleans.

Provider References

I do ask for references from clients (click here for a detailed explanation of how that works). No, this doesn’t mean I want to hear from your thesis director or your boss. This means I would like to personally contact (through email or phone) two or three providers you’ve met with. I’ll talk to that provider, and I’ll ask her a few questions that will (hopefully) let me know I will be safe and comfortable in the client’s presence, and that we will be compatible.

TER Whitelist – The Erotic Review Client Whitelist

Continue reading “My Screening Practices Explained, Part 2: P411, Date-Check, TER, and References”

My Screening Practices Explained – Part 1: Just Google Me, Baby!

**This is Part 1 of a three-part series explaining some of the most common screening methods escorts, providers, and other adult entertainers use to ensure safety and discretion with clients.**

I didn’t want to have to do this, but…


I’m often contacted by potential clients who seem to be a bit perplexed by my screening practices. I know that they may seem odd to some, but as I’ve said elsewhere, this is a necessary process. Now, you’ve probably either already noticed–or have been directed to–my list of accepted screening methods on my FAQ page and my Booking Page. But just to reiterate, here it is again:

Screening


Screening is required for all new friends. I accept the following methods of verification (choose one):

  • -2 provider references (links to her ad or site, and email), OR
  • -Employment Verification: Your full (real) name, the name of your employer, and your company email or direct phone number, OR
  • -If you’re on P411, you may contact me through my P411 profile.
  • -I accept Date-Check as part of my screening process.


Most clients who are sincerely interested in meeting with me understand that, by employing these methods, I am both ensuring my safety and prioritizing discretion, and they are therefore happy to supply this information.

However…


Lately I’ve gotten a number of emails from clients who tell me to simply Google their names. I’ve typed up several polite, well-thought-out explanations as to why this is not an acceptable substitute for my screening process, some of which were met with understanding and acquiescence, others of which were never answered. So, I’ve come to the conclusion that I’ve left my reasoning ambiguous, and I might better serve my clients by explaining what may seem to be an arbitrary list of requirements here.

“Here’s my name. Just Google me, Baby!”


The suggestion, “Just Google me” may seem logical to a client. After all, he may Google his name and find out even more than he’d like me to know, and therefore believe that the info on Google is more than sufficient.

But it’s not. First off, remember that I’ve got a couple Master’s degrees under my belt, so I’m well-versed in research methods, and if Google covered all aspects of client-screening, trust me, I’d be teaching classes on it.

Yes, I can find out a lot about a person just by using Google (probably more than most people realize). The problem arises when I need to verify that I am actually speaking with the person I’m Googling.

Here’s an example of a typical email exchange with a “Just Google me!” client:

  • To: Annie@NOLAcourtesan.com
    From: BobRoss1965@gmail.com
    Subject: Appointment with you tonight
    Message:

    Hey Annie,

    My name is Bob Ross. You may have heard of me. I’m a painter, and I used to have my own TV show. Remember “happy little trees?” Yeah, I started that whole thing. Anyway, I want to meet with you tonight. I know it’s short notice, but I’m sure you can accommodate a slick guy like me.

    Talk to you soon,

    Bob Ross the TV Painter

  • ——————————————————-

  • To: BobRoss1965@gmail.com
    From: Annie@NOLAcourtesan@gmail.com
    Subject: RE: Appointment with you tonight
    Message:

    Hi Bob,

    Thanks for contacting me. While I’d love to meet with you, I have not yet received your screening information, and I’m afraid I can’t schedule an appointment with you until I do. Please review the accepted screening methods I’ve outlined on my Booking page.

    Thanks again,

    Annie

  • ——————————————————-

  • To: Annie@NOLAcourtesan.com
    From: BobRoss1965@gmail.com
    Subject: RE:RE: Appointment with you tonight
    Message:

    Annie,

    I did see that list of screening methods, but like I told you, I’m Bob Ross, and all you have to do is Google me. There’s tons of info about me on the internet. I’m a very important person.

    Bob Ross, the TV Painter

  • ——————————————————-

  • To: BobRoss1965@gmail.com
    From: Annie@NOLAcourtesan@gmail.com
    Subject: RE:RE:RE: Appointment with you tonight
    Message:

    Hi again, Bob.

    I did in fact Google your name. Despite the fact that I do indeed see a lot of information related to Bob Ross, I can’t be sure you are actually him until I’m able to use an email or phone that is traceable to you.

    What I need is an email address that is associated with you publicly and professionally. For instance, if you work for PBS, and the PBS website lists Bob Ross’s email address as BobRoss@PBS.org, that will work perfectly. You can either shoot me a quick email from that account, or I can contact you through that address and you can reply that you’ve received that message. Then, I’ll know that you are really Bob Ross, the TV Painter.

    Alternatively, you can supply a phone number that is traceable to you. Let’s use the PBS example. PBS lists Bob Ross’s office contact number as (504)555-5555. I can call that number and ask to speak to Bob Ross, and all you have to say is “Yes Annie, it’s me,” and I’ll know I’ve been emailing back and forth with the right guy. However, if you only supply me with a phone number for a prepaid phone, or a number that, when Googled, is not attached to your name or business, that doesn’t really help me.

    And if neither of those methods works for you, you can also provide references (names and contact info or websites) from two established professional companions/providers/escorts you’ve met with in the past. I’ll contact them to make sure you’re safe and a gentleman. When they respond positively, I’ll get back to you and we can set up an appointment.

    Thanks for understanding, Bob! Hope to hear from you soon.

    Annie

In this hypothetical, I’m betting Bob doesn’t respond, lol.

I hope this clarifies things. If not, maybe I can show you what I mean with a little example. Let’s pretend this is the first time we’ve encountered one another. Here’s what I’ll say to you:

My name is Julia Roberts. You may have heard of me. I’m an actress–a pretty famous one. Go ahead and Google me; you’ll see lots of information about me and what I do. Now you should feel 100% confident that I’m Julia Roberts, the famous actress who is not dangerous or creepy.

Signed,

Absolutely, Positively, Without-a-Doubt, the Real Julia Roberts®

Now you can be 100% confident you’ll be meeting with Julia Roberts, right? ;)

OK so that’s a pretty ridiculous example, but the truth is, you’d be surprised how often random weirdos on the internet have contacted me claiming to be high-profile local businessmen or surgeons or whathaveyou. You might seem like a reasonable, respectful guy, but I can never be too careful with my safety.

Thanks so much in advance for understanding!

**

By the way:


If you do choose the professional email address route, and you’re concerned about my email address raising a red flag with your employer, I’ve got a solution. When I use this method, I use a separate, unassuming email address (the word “courtesan” is absent, so this email address doesn’t sound sexy.)

Here’s a copy of the email I send:

Please respond to this message for verification purposes.
If you are not the person who requested this message, please reply to this message with the word ‘Remove,’ or simply disregard.

Thank you,

AC


But Wait, There’s More!


My Screening Practices Explained, Part 2: P411, Date-Check, and References


and

Scheduling a Date with an Escort – On Providing References


I’m Back from the Power Outage, or My Trip to the 1800s Courtesy of Hurricane Isaac

Hurricane Isaac sure made a mess of the wires around here, but after nearly a week without power (or internet), I’m back on the grid! Sweet, sweet air conditioning!

However, I’m still without internet, so I’m visiting coffee shops and friends’ houses as often as possible so that I can answer your emails in a timely fashion. I think I’ve just finished replying to all of the emails I’ve missed over the past week, but if for some reason I’ve overlooked yours, please feel free to scold me via email or the comments section of this post, lol. Cross your fingers that my internet comes back soon!

And before I sign off, I want to send a shout-out to the lovely gentleman who surprised me with an adorable pair of heels from my Amazon Wishlist. I’m so excited to wear them now that I’ve recovered from my brief trip to the sweltering, boring, frustrating 1800s, hahaha. I love when packages arrive on my doorstep unannounced (no pun intended…well, maybe a little ;) ).

Hope everyone fared well in Isaac. Please keep those who suffered damage and loss in your thoughts, and if you’re feeling generous, you can donate to the American Red Cross.

Reviews! Fan Mail! Gifts! My clients and readers are awesome!

Well, this past week has been pretty surprising. Let’s review, shall we?

First off, I got an email from a woman whose partner had sent her the link to my blog. The subject line reads: “Add me to the fan club!” (I ain’t too proud to admit that flattery will get you everywhere.) Turns out she’s something of a kindred spirit–not only does she have the same fond memories of being absolutely perplexed by the advice in Cosmopolitan Magazine when she was a teen, but she also shares my passion for Bellocq’s photographs of the Storyville prostitutes.

And who doesn’t love positive feedback?

Speaking of which, I got another type of positive feedback this week, this time in the form of a very flattering review on TER (The Erotic Review) from a client who was an absolute pleasure to meet with.

And then, I realized that I hadn’t even noticed a positive review I received on ECCIE a few weeks back.

And! A client bought me a gift off of my Amazon Wishlist! He got me a year’s subscription to The New Yorker!! It was perfect timing, too, because my subscription was just about to run out. It’s my favorite magazine, and I don’t know how I’d ever convince myself to work out if I didn’t have it to read at the gym. Anyway, he scheduled an appointment and I met with him, and it turns out he’s just as awesome as his taste in gifts :)

Full Disclosure: My Thoughts on Reviews


I don’t have many reviews at all, but I like it that way. While I do allow reviews (I address this briefly on my FAQ page), I don’t want a ton of explicit descriptions of my time with clients floating around the internet. For one thing, I feel like it’s disrespectful to me, and it cheapens our time together (it’s called “intimacy” for a reason, lol). Why should a bunch of men I’ve never met get to be titillated by the time I spent with you, that you paid for? Also–and this is purely from the standpoint of a writer–I believe that, ultimately, these review sites are more predatory than helpful. What it really amounts to is that clients are basically writing porn for the sites, for free, and then the sites turn around and charge other clients to read it. So you’re supplying the content for a site that is selling it, and you don’t even get a share of the profit. Yeah yeah yeah, I understand that everyone profits by getting access to the reviews, but still. If they were really there only for review purposes, they wouldn’t demand in-depth, detailed, explicit play-by-play descriptions of dates. They’d simply require a yes/no recommendation and a short explanation, and leave it up to the reviewer to decide how much to include. That being said, I stand by what I say on my FAQ page: if you’d like to write a brief, tasteful review of our time together, please feel free ;)

Blue Books and Brothels: Storyville and the Legislation of Morality

A while back I met with a gentleman, and one of the topics that came up in conversation was New Orleans’s “sordid” history–namely, the period from 1897-1917 when the city set up Storyville, a red light district where prostitution was legal.

We discussed my fascination with E. J. Bellocq, a photographer working at that time who, despite earning a living photographing (among other relatively mundane things) Catholic school students’ school pictures, was drawn to the…less wholesome side of New Orleans in his art.  He is now best known for his Storyville Portraits, a collection of photographs of Storyville prostitutes taken around 1912, just five years before Storyville was shut down. These pictures weren’t found until after his death, but they’re wildly popular now–so much so that they have completely overshadowed his other work, such as his photos of the opium dens in what was then New Orleans’s Chinatown (now the CBD).

Clara Miller of Mahogany Hall, Prostitute in New Orleans's Storyville
Anyway, a couple days later, after he’d left town, I got an email from him with a link to this site.  It’s a fun little site with lots of info, but I think the most interesting thing about it is the collection of photographs of Blue Books.  Blue Books were basically guides to Storyvile–like the Eros-nola.com of paper.

It’s striking how similar the Blue Books are to the advertising methods used in the industry today.  Look at Clara Miller’s ad–her main selling points are her lovely disposition, her worldly (she’s traveled to Europe) yet relateable (she’s a local girl born near Baton Rouge) personal history, and her eagerness to please (she “can sit up all night if necessary”).  And of course, she’s a beautiful octaroon.  Sounds a lot like an elite professional companion, seeking extended dates, no?

I love the intro, in which the publishers swear that the listings contained in the book are truthful representations of the ladies and services they advertise.  “This book contains nothing but Facts,” they write.  Oh, I wonder how many men were duped by the ol’ bait-and-switch back then.  The predominant business structure in Storyville was the brothel arrangement, where several women worked in a house under a single owner/employer. It was basically the equivalent to today’s agencies. And the brothel owners (Madams) could really submit whatever information, real or false, they believed would attract customers (is this sounding familiar yet?).  I hope they made sure the girls had a chance to read the ads first!


And on that topic, what of the bait-and-switch?  Back then, since the business was legal, I guess situations like that one were much less problematic–it was just a matter of the gentleman saying, “No, thank you, that’s not what I was expecting,” and moving on to the next available lady that struck his fancy.

And what of brothels?  There weren’t really any “independent escorts” in those days; women worked for business owners, who charged them a fee for the room, the advertising, security, etc. (again, like an agency).  This is one of the reasons I’m against “legalizing” sex work–once there are strict regulations, we basically lose all control over how and where we work, and what we do with our own bodies.  Look at the situation in Nevada.  Sure, the brothels are legal, but the women working in them are dehumanized to the point that they are simply equipment, and the laws are such that the person who benefits most from their work is the employer (brothel owner).  The women are not permitted to leave the property (?!????!!!!!??), they are subjected to–and charged for–weekly medical exams*, they must pay rent, a flat grocery fee (regardless of what they eat), and several other miscellaneous fees for services and items they are forced to buy, and they are forced to directly compete with the women they must work and live with for the duration of their stay.  And before they receive their paychecks, the employer takes (from what I understand) about half of their earnings.
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Escorts at Home and Abroad

So I was talking to my friend Lydia in London…

OK, I just have to stop here and admit how worldly I feel when I actually put that in writing. It’s not like I don’t have friends in other parts of the world–I still talk to a guy I met when I did a summer abroad in grad school who is now a doctor in India, and a British girl I met waaaayyy back when I visited Spain who now lives in Italy, just to name a couple. It’s just so rare that I get to name-drop them for worldliness cred, hahahah. I love the internet for a LOT of reasons, but I think one of the biggest ones is the fact that it makes it so easy to keep in touch with–or even meet and befriend–people who live tens of thousands of miles away, and to see what life is like where they are.

Which brings me to the point of this post…sort of.

So anyway, as I was saying, my friend Lydia (an escort in London) and I were talking about some of the differences between the escort (or professional companion or provider or whatever term you prefer) biz here in the U. S. and over there in the U. K. I won’t bore you with all the details, especially since you likely have a pretty good idea, if you know anything about the U. K. And if you don’t, an observant reader can probably figure it out by looking through her her website.

…Which is what I did. And then I started to read her escort blog. And since I’m kind of new at this whole blogging thing, I decided to use one of her blog posts as inspiration for mine.

So, without further ado, I present to you, inspired by a post on Lydia’s blog

 

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