Why Do Some Escorts Prefer Older Men? – Client Questions

Posted on Posted in Ask Annie: Advice from an Escort about Escorts, Intimacy, Relationships, Sexuality, Sex Work, and "The Hobby”

About a month ago, I received the following email:

Hello Annie,

I have a few questions about setting up a date for the first time and other info.The date is not with you but in general for other companions. I stumbled upon your blog and found it fascinating. I really love your writing style. I read all three of your verification parts. You have alot of info on your blog so I don’t know if you have talked about this info or not. I wanted to know as an absolute newbie how do I make a date with a companion either from Backpage to P411. From the blog I see you are busy and your time is valuable, however I am not looking for a synopsis but an in depth explanation. So let me clarify on my question.

  • First, I wanted to know the etiquette of talking to a companion on the phone.
  • How do introduce myself?

    What can I ask and what can’t I ask?

    How do I ask about making an appointment?

    How do I ask about the donation amount and how they want to receive it?

    How do I ask where to meet whether in call or out?

    How do I know if it is a cop on the other end?

    How do I ask for them to verify me as I have no references?

    (I have read your three verification posts and I had joined P411. I have had my employment verified and have a year subscription. I want to know how to bring it up and respond when they ask about my references.)

  • My next question is on etiquette with the same questions but on email or P411 appointment requests.
  • My third question is I live in [Anytown, USA] and majority ads are on Backpage with out any reviews how do I find out if they are legit or not?( Also any other places I should look for companions other than T.E.R, E.C.C.I.E, and the monkey one in my area.)
  • My fourth question is many of the companions are much older than I am but once they hear my age they want nothing to do with me. How do I get my foot through the door with my age. I am 20 Years old and a big guy. I know my age is young but I go to school and work for a living so I dont have time for relationships. Even though my weight has been a big factor in my dating scene. I still want to experience things while I try to lose my weight. Which is a long journey from now. I am very mature for my age. I am a well mannered person. I keep myself well groomed and clean as is physically possible. As a guy who ways 240lbs image and cleanliness means more than anything possible.
  • My fifth question is if I do finally hit gold. What is the etiquette on the date:
  • What should I wear?

    I haven’t shaved “down there” for a while, but what is the formality. Trim or bare?

    What do I say when I meet them?

    If it’s incall where and how do I place the money? Same for outcall?

    What do I talk about and don’t?

    How do I find out about what they can or don’t do without incriminating myself or sounding like an idiot?

    How do I know if they are a cop, is there certain things they say that a companion would never?

    Who makes the first move and I am a shy person in intimate matters. I have the deed once and that was when I was not sober. I barely remember it. To me that doesn’t really count as an experience. So how do I let them know about my level of expertise in general.

  • My whole goal in finding a companion is not just for my own enjoyment but rather a learning experience for future non companion partners. I want to learn what makes a woman tick. How to please them and give them the pleasure that I can get. How do I let a companion know that I want to learn the ins and outs of pleasing a woman in bed. You know from beginning to end. I am weak in the “length” and physique department so I need some other things in the Arsenal until I fix the physique part lol.
  • Many guys look at companions as their brute right and for their pleasure. But, I literally want to enjoy and learn things on a woman that you could not learn without being in a relationship. Let me know if you think my views on this is achievable and realistic. I have been scouring the Internet but it’s mostly Alpha Males and they’re Triumphs. Your blog is something I have been looking for. A chance of getting info from not a client side but by the companion side.

This is everything that my mind has been searching for on this subject but I have gotten no where. I know I wrote a shit ton lol. It would mean a lot if you helped me. If you need something in return let me know. I am hopeful of your response.

P.S. I know this email is fake. That is to make sure no one stumbles on this email message also please excuse any grammatically and punctuational errors as I have typed and formatted this on my phone. I’m not as good at writing as you are!

Thank You,
[Joe Shmoe]

My Response:

There are a lot of questions here! I’m finally sufficiently inspired to start my escort/client advice client. And fortunately, this one email has provided me with a ton of material. So I’ve chosen to break them up into a few blog entries. Here’s my response to the age-old “old-age” question. Here goes!

Q: Why do some escorts prefer older clients?

A: I suspect it’s because the provider has kids your age and either it seems weird, or she’s afraid you could be a friend of her kids. How awkward would it be if you met a wonderful girl a year or two from now and fell deeply, passionately in love (partially because you’re a fantastic, skilled, generous lover, thanks to all the practice you’ve had with a skilled escort), and when she brought you home to meet her amazing family, you and her mother immediately recognize each other because mom is the one who taught you all those techniques? A sudden and unintended Mrs. Robinson moment.

A Mrs. Robinson moment with you, your girlfriend, and her escort mother.
Sure, it’s sexy in the movie…at first.
This is why some escorts don’t see younger clients.

Yikes. So yeah, besides the absolutely horrifying (and yet…maybe kinda sexy? just a little? kidding, kidding) situation you’d be in, the escort (aka your future mother-in-law) would in quite a pickle herself. I know a lot of ladies with kids have very strict rules set in place so that their children aren’t negatively impacted by their choice of work.

As for ladies who are very young, well, it’s a small world. Perhaps she’s afraid to see very young clients because, since you’re in the same age group, the chances of you having mutual friends are significantly higher.

I know that I do *usually* shy away from very young guys, especially guys under 21, mostly because I’m worried about engaging in ANY adult activity with someone that young. If I arrived and they were drinking, for example, could I be charged with Contributing? And what if they’re actually only 17, but have a really good fake ID?!?! I would be pretty nervous. You seem really mature and like you have a good head on your shoulders though, so I’d probably be OK with meeting with you…

More to come!

More answers from this list of questions:

4 thoughts on “Why Do Some Escorts Prefer Older Men? – Client Questions

  1. Funny thing, when I saw the headline, I figured it was older-older guys, like me :) As for younger guys, from what I’ve read, it’s mostly that they’re too rowdy, insensitive, or aggressive/impatient. I don’t know, everyone is different, but we do tend to mellow with age.

    Mr. Shmoe, though, has a lot of self-esteem issues that he should work out, A roll in the hay might help a little, but the other stuff will keep getting in the way, long term.

    Sexual frustration is a real drag, so I hope he can get some satisfaction. There are definitely ladies out there who are noob-friendly. He should get on some sites like NightShift or TER to find out the etiquette aspect of the escort world, and the forums those sites host are also good resources for many of his questions.

    1. Well, I don’t actually know him, so I can’t really comment on his self esteem or lack thereof. But he’s a 20 year old man, and I’m guessing that most (yeah yeah, I know, lots of y’all were absolute studs at that age) 20 year old men aren’t super confident yet in regards to sex. But he seems to respect providers enough to have thought this through quite a bit and is doing his best to be prepared.

      And lots of us are noob-friendly, we just require some screening. As long as he finds a good, reputable provider and he cooperates with her screening requirements, he’ll be fine, I think. Maybe he has already!

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